It's all make believe, isn't it?

“I used to think as I looked out on the Hollywood night, ‘There must be thousands of girls sitting alone like me dreaming of being a movie star. But I’m not going to worry about them. I’m dreaming the hardest.” -Marilyn Monroe

When I was a little girl, my mother would sit me down and make me watch Elvis Presley movies with her. She would sit there, wide eyed and giddy, singing along to the tunes coming out of the television. Elvis was a big part of my childhood. His music would glide through our house, playing over and over again on the cd player. We all knew the lyrics, whether we wanted to or not, and we all secretly loved The King. It was never Christmas unless 'Blue Christmas' was playing, and every year on January 8th, we would celebrate, in a small way, Elvis Aaron Presley's birthday.

Learning to love Elvis from an early age helped me in discovering some of the other stars of the past. The Rat Pack, Elizabeth Taylor, Lucille Ball, and most importantly Marilyn Monroe. I don't really remember when I truly fell in love with Norma Jean, but I most certainly don't remember a time when I wasn't.

Marilyn Monroe is a figure that we all tend to claim as our own. Our icon, our idol, our symbol. We all take her and use her to our own advantage. We misquote her, we degrade her, we dehumanize her just to put her on a t-shirt. But we all do it because of love and admiration. But in the end isn't that what killed her? I most definitely have used her to my advantage. And I'm sure I will in the future. She is a part of history. Someone whose person has been taken away, and all that is left is a 2D figure on a calendar, and a character in a film. She has become public property.

In my bedroom at my parents house I have a replica of the iconic white dress. I bought it in New York City at Patricia Field's boutique (the stylist for Sex and the City). It was hanging on my wall off of a comedy mask, beside a picture frame filled with different Marilyn poses from a calendar. Every morning I would wake up and stare at it. An iconic piece of white cloth, hanging lifeless. It made me think, and it made me sad.

A few years ago a little tv show called Smash came along. A story of the trials of making a Broadway musical. The subject, Marilyn. The show mirrored some of Marilyns famous downfalls and story lines. Drugs and alcohol, men abusing their power and her fame, and someone being thrown into the spotlight. In the show, which was not perfect but beautiful in its own way, we got a stunning song from Marc Shaiman and Scott Wittman that gives us a bit of a summary of Marilyns thoughts towards show business. 'They Just Keep Moving The Line' is heartbreaking, truthful and will forever be iconic. Paired with Megan Hilty's insane vocals and beautiful Marilyn portrayal, we have a performance that will go down in history. Marilyn has been gone 55 years and she is still impacting our entertainment. I don't think her story will ever leave our thoughts, and I wouldn't want it any other way.

I wish I could go back in time and have a conversation with her. Find out who the girl behind the blonde was. What was she like, what was she thinking? I cannot even begin to imagine the array of thoughts that must have burst through her mind every day. I wish her finale could have ended differently. That we could of had her for the past 55 years. That she could have gone on and helped the industry. Her knowledge and wisdom is something no one can buy, not even for 50 cents.

Thank you Marilyn Monroe for who you were. Thank you for what you gave to us and what you sacrificed. I hope to meet you one day, and I'll make sure your legacy lives on.